It's MzMartiPants to you!

Originally published at Marti Abernathey. You can comment here or there.

Nik’s performance
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Originally published at Marti Abernathey. You can comment here or there.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Originally published at Marti Abernathey.com. You can comment here or there.

I posted over at Transadvocate about my experience at the IFGE convention in Tuscon, Arizona. I kept to the positive, but there is another more negative side personally. One thing I noticed, was the hierarchies within the transcommmunity. How the “pretty people” , the crossdressers, the rich, the poor, all fall into clusters or clicks. Like most of my life, I feel like I don’t really fit anywhere. I’m not sure if that’s self perception, or just a natural reaction to others. Starting a non-profit, I’m going to have to attend a lot of these conferences. I’m finding myself fighting my own inner sense of not belonging. I’m fighting my own demons. One of the big demons right now is my weight. Someone I met at the conference asked me about my sexual preference. It was obvious that she was sexually attracted to me and wanted me. I told her flat out that my own shit, my body image issues, keep me from feeling comfortable with being physically intimate. Mind you, I wouldn’t have had sex with someone that hit on me at a conference. I just don’t do one nighters, but that wasn’t the point. The reality of me right now is that I just don’t think I could let someone in that close to me right now. It would definitely have to be someone that I trusted immensely. These demons are something that I really need to fight, if I want to be successful at the goals that I’ve set.

Then an incident in a online GLBT group I’m a part of really hit me square in the gut. I was reminded where in the hierarchy of importance a transwoman is. I’m still kind of reeling from that. It’s STFU or get out, at least that’s how it felt. Effectively while others can post their opinions, I can’t. Unless I’m quiet, I’m silent, I’m positive, I know my place, I won’t be allowed to be a part of the group. There’s a part of me that knows the importance of this group. I know that being a part of it has opened a lot of doors for me. But I also know that it’s just a matter of time before I’m kicked off. Shut up or leave. I’m really not sure which I can, or should do. Time will tell.

I’m trying to refocus things. I’ve decided that it’s time once again to compact my life, and my goals. Monday I start my part time job. It’s only three hours a day, but it’s going to cut into my blogging and political activities. I’m happy that I found it, but it’s going to be an adjustment. The money from this job is going directly into my savings account and will not be touched except for surgery. Donna Rose has talked recently about balance, and how important it is. One of the things I really miss is doing radio work. I have to make a place for that in my life. It brings me almost as much joy as my writing. But to fit that into my life is going to take removing something else. I’m going to take this weekend to figure out what that is.

I honestly wish that I could bottle the feeling I had in Tuscon. One friend in particular, I wish I had access to on a daily basis. Being around her in Tuscon felt like being around a fountain of youth. Her optimism and hope was really something that inspired me. I want to hold on to that inspiration and hope. It’s definitely hard for me. It’s against what I’ve been taught, what I’ve been told, and how others have treated me. I need more people like her (and my friend R.) in my life.

One of the things I’m going to let my readers into here, is my weight struggle. If you want to see my thoughts, feelings, and struggles on my way to my goal, bookmark Transfatty, my weight loss blog.

At times, hope is the only thing I cling to. This week has been one of those times.

Originally published at Marti Abernathey.com. You can comment here or there.

I want it to be this guy:

Originally published at Marti Abernathey.com. You can comment here or there.

I love to laugh, and one of meh online friends makes me gut laugh often. She used to make videos off her site, but I recently found that she is now on YouTube. This makes me extremely happy! Some of my recent favorites:

or

Some of my old favorites that I wish she would put up on YouTube:

“Let’s Give Idaho To The Men”

“The Bee Gees Can Change the World”

and

“I think they’re calling me a whore (which I am)”

Her blog
Her YouTube channel
Her YouTube RSS

Originally published at Marti Abernathey.com. You can comment here or there.

I was searching for an old post on my LiveJournal that I wanted to share with my cousin, and I started reading old posts. I read this old post and almost cried. I wrote a post called “I live, I die” on March 10th, 2004. This is an excerpt:

“I am feeling very lethargic. I think it’s the meds I am on. Ive had some pretty horrid thoughts lately. I wont follow through with it though. My father slowly killed himself and died when I was 11. I refuse to do the same to my kids, so I my life is a living hell. I don’t want to live, I don’t want to die. So I exist.”

That is exactly how I felt then. In August of 2000 I got divorced from my wife of 7 years and went into a very dark place. I stayed in that place pretty much for the next four or five years. The divorce was brutal on me. I had never felt such pain in my life. The only thing I can even closely compare it with was the death of my father.

When I wrote that paragraph above in my LJ, I hadn’t seen my children in two years. I had gotten so depressed I saw a therapist through work and they put me on Lexapro. WRONG THING TO DO FOR ME. We lived on the 29th floor of a high rise apartment and I started having fantasies about taking a nose dive off the balcony. I knew it was the meds. I stopped taking them, and those feelings stopped. But i still felt trapped in a life I hated, not wanting to live, but not wanting to die either.

I started writing my journal out of my own sense of fear, loneliness, and most of all, raw, emotionally crippling, gut clenching pain. I don’t think anyone wishes pain on themselves, but that pain did give birth to of my greatest gift, my writing. Nietzsche once said “You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star.” I truly believe that.

I look back on those entries and it feels like I’m reading entries from another person. My world is so different now. I feel totally different about my life, my outlook, and my hopes and dreams. I can be alone, and be ok. I’m happy to be alive. Being joyful rocks.

Originally published at Marti Abernathey.com. You can comment here or there.

There were some highlights…

Transadvocate is a year old, my writing has gotten read more, and spread out more.

But in a lot of ways, 2007 sucked. The phone theme I made for New Years pretty much says it all.

I’m looking to be more positive this year, and enjoy what life brings me.

But fuck, 2007 really did suck.

So, I've decided for those of you that dig my shit from TA, add transadvocate to your friends list. I've stopped publishing it here. I am going to start writing my autobiography online (complete with video) and that will continue to be posted here from Marti Abernathey.com

:) oh, and hi!

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

From the AP Stylebook:

“Use the pronoun preferred by the individuals who have acquired the physical characteristics (by hormone therapy, body modification, or surgery) of the opposite sex and present themselves in a way that does not correspond with their sex at birth. If that preference is not expressed, use the pronoun consistent with the way the individuals live publicly.”

Now keeping that in mind when you see this image:

Name: Francis Renee White

Headline from WTKR

Suffolk Man Charged With Injecting Silicone Into Transgender Patients Without A License

I’m very aware of the crime that Ms. White committed, but writing the story this way shows either malice or ignorance of transgender people. And it definitely goes against a standard that most journalists follow.

Should I really be surprised though? It IS Virginia based media, after all. The culture there is a hyper conservative (they still celebrate Lee-Jackson Day, for example) . I thought they’d joined the 21 century, but I guess I was wrong.

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

From a recent report out of UCLA entitled: Comparison of Hate Crimes Rates Across Protected and Unprotected Groups ( by Rebecca Stotzer, Public Policy Research Fellow at the Williams Institute)

Current proposed legislation would change certain existing federal hate crime laws to add sexual orientation and gender identity as protected categories. Sexual orientation and gender identity are important categories for inclusion in federal law because members of these groups are just as likely to be victimized as members of other groups that are already covered, such as those based on race, religion, or national origin. A close analysis of hate crime rates demonstrates that groups that are already covered by hate crime laws, such as African Americans, Muslims, and Jews, report similar rates of hate crime victimization as lesbians, gay men, and bisexuals, who are not currently federally protected. On average:

• 8 in 100,000 African Americans report being the victim of hate crime
• 12 in 100,000 Muslims report being the victim of hate crime
• 15 in 100,000 Jews report the victim of hate crime
• 13 in 100,000 gay men, lesbians, and bisexuals report being the victim of hate crime

Jim Burroway over at Box Turtle Bulletin has written about how:

“Many anti-gay activists point to the FBI’s Hate Crime Statistics to claim that gays and lesbians are not “oppressed” compared to anybody else. ”

He discusses the glaring faults in the collection process. But what is enlightening about this new report is found when you look beyond the raw numbers:

The FBI’s raw counts of hate crimes do not take into account the size of the populations covered. For example, racial and ethnic minorities account for about 30% of the total population of the United States, but the estimated population that identifies as gay, lesbian, or bisexual is only about 4%. Therefore, calculating proportional rates of possible victimization provides another important perspective for comparing hate crimes across groups.

And of the transgender population:

“Despite issues of underreporting from law enforcement agencies, some additional data suggest that hate crimes against transgender people are a significant problem. Community organizations and other interested groups have been tracking hate crimes against transgender people for several years. In particular, the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs (NCAVP) includes transgender people in their collection of hate crime data against sexual minorities. When examining reports on 14 major cities, 5 states, and one multi-state region since 1997, the NCAVP reports an average of 213 hate crimes per year against transgender people. In 2004, the NCAVP reported the highest number of hate crimes against transgender people: 321 hate crimes. Nationally, this level of violence is comparable to the level of violence perpetrated against Muslims since 2002. Thus, the inclusion of gender identity in the categories reported in the Uniform Crime Reports and in the new National Incident Based Reporting System (NIBRS) system would allow for more tracking of this serious problem.”

Because transgender people aren’t even included in the collection of hate crimes of statistics, collection of data is fuzzy at best. But even with the fuzzy numbers, comparing the hate crimes with Muslims and trangender people is very telling. Since 9/11 many Americans see Muslim Americans as terrorists. It makes you wonder what the numbers would look like if the collection of data on transgender people were obtained in the same way as it is with race, religion, sexual orientation, or ethnicity/national origin.

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

During the HRC/LOGO Presidential Forum John Edwards was asked:

MR. SOLOMONESE: Susan Stanton is in our audience tonight. She was, for 17 years, the city manager in Largo , Florida . She did her job well; she was respected and admired. And when it was revealed that she was transgender, she was fired. So my question for you is if a member of your staff came to you and told you that they were transgender and that they were thinking of transitioning, how would you react to that? And who in your life has influenced what your reaction might be? MR. EDWARDS: I would — I would support them in every possible way, including on a personal and an emotional level, provide every bit of help and support that I possibly could in going through what they were going through.

And, by the way, can I say about the first point you made in your question, it’s the reason we need powerful employment nondiscrimination laws in the United States of America so that people cannot be fired.

Yet, as I look at the list of John Edward’s GLBT supporters 1, 2 it doesn’t seem to include anyone that is transgender. Both Hilary Clinton and John Edwards have formal GLBT committees that include transgender people. Maybe Joe should have asked him if he’d hire someone that’s transgender (or announce transgender supporters).

In other news on the forum, Hillary Rosen recently stated that:

Despite some advice that the only issue worth discussing at the forum was marriage because it was the only issue the major candidates didn’t agree with us on, we quickly decided that we wanted a broader focus. These candidates were unlikely, in our view, to come to this forum and be blown away by the cogent arguments of our panelists and change their position in favor of same sex marriage. “

She went on to say:

“We wanted a discussion of transgender issues since we knew it was unlikely to come up anywhere else.”

Who’s fault was it that only one transgender question was asked (for that matter, a lack of questions on HIV/AIDS, DADT, and other important GLBT issues)?

“As we saw in their responses, whether deliberate or not, the candidates often tried to run out the clock on their answers. Each interview went by so fast that we found our selves in the control booth cursing as we gave Margaret her time signals.In the end, the only thing I can really regret is that we didn’t have more time. There was so much more to ask about and so much more to hear.”

Can you really put all the blame on the candidates? It’s not the candidates fault that only one transgender question (and a softball question at that) was asked. The moderator of the forum is there to MODERATE when the candidates are trying to run out the clock. The moderator gets her cues from the “control booth.” If Hillary wants someone to blame, she need only look in the nearest mirror.

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

I was recently alerted to a blog post entitled “Academic intolerance.” He discusses an article written by Alice Dreger entitled “The Controversy Surrounding The Man Who Would Be Queen: A Case History of the Politics of Science, Identity, and Sex in the Internet Age.” It will be published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior.

Digging into her article, she says:

“I also believe that a scholarly history of this controversy is critically necessary to advancing both transgender rights and sexology, two things about which I care deeply.”

I asked a friend of mine what exactly a “scholarly history” is. She said:

“It means a thorough research of the field, including review of the work of other scholars who have written accounts of the same history. “

Looking further, I found this definition:

Scholarly history, in contrast, seeks to discover new knowledge or to reinterpret existing knowledge. Good scholars wish to write clearly and simply, and they may spin a compelling yarn, but they do not shun depth, analysis, complexity, or qualification. Scholarly history draws on as many primary sources as practical.

And weave a yarn she does! The thread of the history she writes about is firestorm that followed the release of J. Michael Bailey’s now infamous book, “The Man Who Would Be Queen: The Science of Gender-Bending and Transsexualism.”

Read the rest of this entry »

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

The post that follows this will discuss Alice Dreger’s “The Controversy Surrounding The Man Who Would Be Queen: A Case History of the Politics of Science, Identity, and Sex in the Internet Age.“

As a matter of disclosure, I believe before I can discuss this journal article I must be clear about a few points.

1. I’m not a supporter of Andrea James or Calpernia Addam’s websites. From years of visiting their sites and taking part in their forums, I’ve found that they support a “Stepford Wife” stereotype that many feminists object to. Alice Dreger refers to it as the “feminine essence narrative.”

I can’t really speak for anyone else, but this narrative doesn’t fit with my experience. I wasn’t born in the wrong body. I was born in THIS body. My gender identity doesn’t match my biological sex. It isn’t a matter of right or wrong, but of an ingrained sex identity that has been with me for as long as I can remember. A look at history suggests that gender variance naturally occurs across most cultures and in many animal species.

2 . I don’t agree with J Michael Bailey’s thesis that groups transsexuals into either “autogynephilic” or homosexual” transsexuals categories. He tries to make something very complex, simple. In doing so, it strips any context away and creates a cartoonish version of what transgenderism is and means. He did much the same thing when he claimed that bisexuals (”in men there’s no hint that true bisexual arousal exists, and that for men arousal is orientation “) or lesbians (”I’m not even sure females have a sexual orientation. But they have sexual preferences.“) don’t really exist, based on genital stimulation to pornography.

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

I was a little ticked off at the HRC/Logo Presidential Forum, when Melissa Etheridge asked Governor Richardson if he thought that homosexuality is a choice or something that you are born with. First, I wasn’t aware that if you choose to have sex with someone that you are in jeopardy of losing your civil rights and more important, that it would be okay that your civil rights were revoked simply because you were able to make that choice.
Second, I wasn’t aware of any medical breakthroughs proving that homosexuality is something one is born with. I don’t think that any of us have a real choice when it concerns attractions. I’ve been attracted to both men and women. But, are we born with a predetermination of which sex we will be attracted to?
According to the American Psychiatric Association;

There are numerous theories about the origins of a person’s sexual orientation; most scientists today agree that sexual orientation is most likely the result of a complex interaction of environmental, cognitive and biological factors.

Should the question of choice Vs. Nature really have been brought up at a Presidential Forum
when the whole premise that homosexuality is not a choice is based on theory?
Furthermore, should the message that is sent to America from the largest LGBT organization be, that if it is a choice we don’t deserve civil rights?
I guess that when Melissa asked that question, she wasn’t thinking about a woman’s right to choose.

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

I wasn’t going to post anything about the Logo/HRC Presidential Forum. I’ve read most of the blogs and I felt as though all sides were represented and I honestly didn’t feel like beating a dead horse. That is, until that horse came back to life and galloped into my mail box.
This afternoon I opened my mail, half amused to see a letter with the HRC logo on it, but then my head exploded. Apparently, I can get a Visa credit card, embossed with that beautiful HRC Equal sign and every time I use it to make a purchase, Visa will donate money to the Human Rights Campaign. Isn’t that wonderful? I was fired from my job because I am transsexual but I live in a state where same sex marriage is legal, I wonder if they’ll still give me a credit card.
I don’t know why but I expected better from HRC this time (I must have been in a brief coma).
During the Presidential Forum, The Human Rights Campaign treated transgender people with the same respect they always have. Transgender concerns received just as much attention as the bark beetle and judging by the attention that we both received, it seems as though we are both going to be exterminated.

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

When I was Stone Blue … Rock and Roll sure helped me through ….

Warning beforehand, this is a fluff-piece – you’ll have to excuse me. Actually, a little of this can be blamed on Verizon commercials.

What originally inspired this was the return of typical south Texas summer heat in all its oppressively humid splendor. Mostly we’d been spared this year, save for July 21 (my birthday) and one other day in June – the only profusely body-moistening days so far this year. It’s an oppressive climate sometimes. Typical heat brings the discomfort, discomfort brings discontent, discontent seeks an outlet – it’s a generally predictable pattern.

A little background, I also live without air conditioning and heat – by choice, mostly. After being laid off in Jan. 2003, it was obvious budgetary reasons. Since then, with the continued “economic recovery” (income deflation and cost inflation), I’ve continued the practice. Houston’s known as for disproportionately expensive electric and gas utility bills. It’s mostly not too bad until the really extreme humidity sets in.

Yeah, I know – New York is humid, Washington is humid, lots of east coast places are humid. But when I hear folks there complaining in real time about it, I can’t help but chuckle. Courtney Sharp, a New Orleans native, and I both shared a laugh at DC’s “humidity.” Ask anyone in the Gulf Coastal region, it’s a different climate here in more ways than social.

Back to the subject, I sat waiting for my computer to cool down and watched a bit of TV. Lo, there was a Verizon commercial with a guy doing an AC/DC imitation in his copy room at work – a grown-up who never grew up. It got me to thinking: why the hell am I up here sweating when I could be downstairs diverting my focus on the heat with an album or two?

Yes, album. Being a vintage ’57 model, I grew up in the 60’s and 70’s vinyl era. No, this isn’t about fetish clothing a la tranny, but music media – LP albums to be exact, turntables and the like. It was a great escape for those of us, pre-computer and internet, when we all thought we were alone. Maybe that isolation wasn’t so for New York or L.A. or the Bay Area. But for transpeople in the howling hinterlands between the left and right coast, and especially in the heart of South Texas, isolation was as pervasive as life itself.

And music was the soundtrack to life. More than any other genre, rock and roll became a more symbolic form, more attention demanding than any other category. It’s defined generations, added subconscious imagery to mass marketing, and even become a suggestive influence for the more vulnerable and impressionable (think Judas Priest and the suicides, or N.W.A. and the gangsta wannabes).

While music would never dictate my life choices, it certainly had its soothing qualities – savage breast notwithstanding. It was also a wonderful shared experience, whether it was concerts (a rare and eagerly anticipated “event” in Corpus Christi), cruising around with the cassette or eight-track blasting, or even simply kicking back at home playing albums and partaking in our favorite intoxicant – in whatever form that may have taken.

It was probably just me, but it seemed like a much more magical time.

We certainly had heaping portions of teen angst, lack of opportunity, frustration, and sensory and cultural malnourishment. Authority and social mores were hollow and hypocrisy-filled, it was pre-computer age (much fewer distractions) and our future lives appeared to be an ultimate dead-end. As Jimi Hendrix sang in a line from Manic Depression© “I know what I want, but I just don’t know how to go about getting it.” The endless humid heat coupled with boredom and idleness caused us to be both outwardly and self-destructive. It’s amazing that we kept from killing ourselves! No one questioned the condition: we were all in the same boat. Think the movie “Dazed and Confused”: Then exchange the live oak woods outside of Austin for the open beaches and sand dunes outside of Corpus Christi – everything else was exactly the same, save for the surfboards.

Yet even with all of that seemingly spirit-crushing outlook on life, we managed to be happy! We managed to find something to fill that gaping maw, and it had little to do with a perpetual buzz or simply “hanging out at the island (the beach).” It ultimately boiled down to music.

For music, we’d hop in the car and drive 6 hours and 400 miles across state to attend a Texas Jam in Dallas. We’d spend a weekend sleeping in the Astrodome parking lot, eating and drinking little, in hopes of snagging a ticket to a sold-out concert – or alternately just hanging out in the parking lot, partying and feeding off of the multitude of open cars and trucks blaring music. Even in talking with a lot of the others in the trans community, music was the one constant that kept us from going off the deep end.

Even though it was pre-trans years, and I was internally conflicted, it was unnoticeable in the midst of all the others standing sweat-drenched in the open summer sun, baking like potatoes ‘til our skins were almost equally as brown and crispy. And through it all was the soundtrack of the quintessential, emotion-charging, high-energy songs of summer – songs to bake by.

Yes, I was into Punk and New Wave, but not many other folks in South Texas were. Even so, Punk was more intimate music for smaller venues, being born in the pubs and smoky little basement bars. Loud, very much so. Expansive and reverberating outdoor music, no.

Not sure why, but very few songs from outside the US were on this list, surprisingly (esp. for UK groups). Possibly it was because of their more complicated and sophisticated rhythm and song structure – the progressive rock. The synergistic songs that seemed to inspire action, regardless of heat-fatigue, were those more reliant on the up-temp power chord crunch. There was one John Lennon song, Instant Karma that made it in that category. And also an Aussie group, AC/DC with Problem Child, that also had that spontaneous activating quality.

The rest were all American continent groups, most with something to do with Texas. Songs like Ted Nugent’s Free For All, and Bachman-Turner Overdrive’s Roll On Down the Highway (Canadian), Kiss’ Calling Dr. Love, the Raspberries’ Go All The Way and the Sweet’s Ballroom Blitz were there to be sure – none really anything to do with Texas then (though conservative Ted’s now a Texas resident).

Maybe Texas was more inclined towards setting up amps in open areas (like beaches) and just letting the music blast forth, neighbors-be-damned. It was really the mentality, blare until the police came and shut it down. We had ZZ Top with LaGrange, Steve Miller Band (who lived in Dallas) with Jungle Love, the Eagles’ Good Day in Hell and at the tail end of the era, Stevie Ray Vaughan’s When The House Is Rockin’. Save for the middle break, Edgar Winter’s instrumental Frankenstein would be there as well.

The #3 all-time top beach songs had no connection with anything to do with Texas (save for Ronnie Montrose being in Edgar Winter’s group at an earlier point, and both Winter brothers being from Orange, TX). But this isn’t six degrees of Texas. Actually there were two Montrose songs off of their first album that really rated in this, as Space Station #5 should also make this list. But the one song, Rock The Nation, was another of those blistering, power-chord reverberation heavy songs that would get cranked to top volume and echo up and down the shore. Needless to say, the song subject was equally appropriate.

The Doobie Brothers weren’t from Texas, nor had connections to it, but one of their songs was probably the #2 quintessential beach / summer sunburn song and captured the essence of relentless summer heat in our neck of the woods. China Grove was really not even an official town, more just a collection of businesses and a few homes and trailers at the intersection of Rigsby and Foster Rd. just outside the Loop, east of San Antonio. There’s nothing there. Why it rated a song, I have no idea. But it was a song that captured the essence of summer for us then.

The top summer song that floated my boat back then, whether the beach or campgrounds, was yet another Texas boy from Orange. Rick Derringer was a one-hit wonder, and never enjoyed much recognition in his solo career. However, his one hit was a good one. Rock and Roll Hoochie Koo used to blast out of a jukebox at our lonely little campground west of San Antonio on our two family vacations up the Nueces River. It was one of the few decent songs on the box, and it got the overwhelming lion’s share of play. In my mind’s eye, I can still hear (and even feel) the beat from the bass-thumping box a football field away, wending through the live oaks every night. Even at the coast, in the mid-day heat, it was enough to get us energized, to inspire harder play in the pick up football games or give it our all in traffic Frisbee games on the drive-on beach. There was just something about that crunch that shook your bones, no matter how heat-fatigued, and activated you. It also helped you put the heat out of mind, arguably one of, if not the most important quality of all!

Clearly, this is not a definitive list for everyone. Certainly age and the era we grew up in will influence other songs filling that list. I can see a Guns N’ Roses Welcome To the Jungle, a Nirvana Smells Like Teen Spirit, or even Marilyn Manson’s Mobscene or something from Korn being subsequent generations’ top outdoor summer songs. There will be other suggestions and a near-infinite number of opinions on how they beat the heat, pain (physical or emotional), quell frustration or simply keep their focus. But for my prime of youth era, for me and for those I also observed, these were the songs that did it. Whatever gets you through your life! (thanks again, John Lennon)

As I wrap this up, it’s another of those more typical summer days in Houston, a smoggy, humid, 100 degrees with a bullet at 3PM. Even in oppressive heat, it works! Besides the cicadas rattling outside, you can guess what I’m listening to at the moment. Sorry about the noise, neighbors!

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

It was billed as the “HRC Foundation and Logo Presidential Forum” but you could have just as easily called it the “HRC and Logo Presidential Forum on Marriage Equality. But it wasn’t supposed to be that way.

According to Donna Rose’s blog:

“I have been told by people who would know that a decision has already been made that each candidate will be given a “T” question (their words, not mine). When I sent my list of questions this morning (the deadline was noon), part of the response I got back was that they particularly “like the more general ones because it requires them to be more forthcoming.”

For the record, there was ONE question during the entire forum that was a “T” question. Joe Solmonese asked John Edwards the following question:

“Susan Stanton is in our audience tonight. She was, for 17 years, the city manager in Largo, Florida. She did her job well; she was respected and admired. And when it was revealed that she was transgender, she was fired. So my question for you is if a member of your staff came to you and told you that they were transgender and that they were thinking of transitioning, how would you react to that? And who in your life has influenced what your reaction might be?”

Read the rest of this entry »

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

I won’t lie, I’m a lover of history. One of the the blogs I regularly read is Civil War Women. The blog is thick with biographies of women that lived and thrived in the Civil War era. One of the “women” she posted about caught my eye. He was born Jennie Irene Hodgers, but lived most of his adult life as Albert D.J. Cashier. Albert served in the 95th Illinois Infantry Regiment. The 95th was was part of the Army of the Tennessee, led by Ulysses S. Grant. The 95th engaged in many fierce battles including including the siege at Vicksburg, the Red River Campaign and the combat at Guntown, Mississippi.

After the Civil War, Albert worked as a janitor, a lamplighter, and other odd jobs. It was not until a car accident that 1910, was revealed Albert was female bodied. His caretakers kept his secret, even when he was admitted into the Soldiers’ and Sailors’ Home at Quincy, Illinois. It wasn’t until he was admitted to Watertown State Hospital for the Insane, that the secret became widely known.

You can read a wonderful biography of him here.

Even a cursory look at his life suggests that he was transgender. The evidence:

1. He volunteered on August 6, 1862 in Boone County. When his regiment was retired in 1865, they were in Belvidere, Illinois. He could have stayed in his home town of Bevidere, if he wished to return to life as a woman. Yet he moved 138 miles southeast of Boone County, to Saunemin, IL and continued to live as a man.

2. It might be argued that he did not live as a woman because he wanted the pension that came with service. But to receive the pension Albert would have been required to take a physical exam. He refused until later in life, when he was assured that his secret would not be made public.

3. At the Watertown State Hospital for the Insane, he had NOTHING to gain from living as a man. Yet even then when forced to wear a skirt he would bring the skirt in with pins to make the skirt into pants.

4. Albert secured his home with a number of locks, changing them  frequently in case someone had somehow gotten a key. If he was going to be away from his house, he nailed the windows shut. Why? Being female bodied, there would be some evidence in his home of this.

Albert D.J. Cashier went to great lengths to protect his gender identity all his life. Even in death, he was gendered male. Those who knew and loved him went to great pains to keep his secret.

Rest in peace, my brother.

Originally published at Transadvocate. Please leave any comments there.

When Kayne West said “George Bush doesn’t care about black people!” , he was partly right. George Bush doesn’t care about the majority of Americans or what they care about.  From HRC’s “Back Story” blog:

 It’s really sad, but apparently Bush never tires of catering to his base, despite the undeniable (and well publicized) loss of confidence in his judgment and leadership by the majority of Americans. It’s not that complicated.  In May, Gallup released a poll that showed overwhelming support for adding sexual orientation and gender identity to the new hate crimes law.  There was strong support across demographic lines.   There were just 26% of Americans against the new law. 

Apparently he doesn’t even care about his own party. With his poll numbers in the tank at 29%, he continues the war in Iraq against what the American people have repeatedly stated they want. If there is no change in his position by November 2008, Republicans will lose seats in both houses by a historic margin.

And why would he go against the majority of Americans that support hate crimes legislation? According to a statement in the Washington Times, the White House will veto the legislation because:

“The qualifications [in the bill] are so broad that virtually any crime involving a homosexual individual has potential to have hate crimes elements,” - White House spokesman Tony Fratto

This is the same type of false rhetoric that the religious right is throwing around. From the legislation,  a hate crime is committed when one:

“willfully causes bodily injury to any person or, through the use of  fire, a firearm, or an explosive or incendiary device, attempts to cause bodily injury to any person, because of the actual or perceived religion, national origin, gender, sexual orientation, gender identity or disability of any person“

George Bush (and Republicans in general) haven’t worked to invalidate 18 U.S.C. § 245 (b)(2), the hate crimes law that was passed in 1969, so I’m not sure why he’d veto this one.

I honestly can’t figure out why he’s doing this. The Republican Party has been on an upswing since 1994. Yet he seems to be oblivious to polling, to the what the American people want, or much of anything else that will keep his party from being destroyed in 2008.

And the thing that is most befuddling is that this legislation will pass.  It’s simply a matter of when, not if. By putting up this roadblock he’s turning more voters against the Republican Party.  In the end, he’s harming his own party and the American people.

I still ask myself, for what reason?